azhong wrote:(Again, thank you in advance for your assistance.
This is a translation practice. I don't plan to translate the short novel over. I can't, either.
The first paragraph has been revised by removing the impersonal narrative.)
Keigo had lasted grinding ink for quite a while; the sound of the ink stick grinding on the inkstone reigned over the six-tatami room. Not a sound could be heard from the next room, where his wife had been decorating the shrine. He wondered if she was finished.
After finding the color strong enough, Keigo stopped, put the ink stick down and took up a calligraphy brush. He dipped some ink with the nib, then closed his eyes softly. He had decided what words to write.
This is nice: I can imagine exactly what is happening, as if I could see it. Just two changes: "Keigo had been grinding ink for quite a while." The word "lasting" shouldn't be used as a transitive verb ("it had lasted" is fine; "he had lasted it" is not).
The other suggestion is actually a question. You wrote: "He dipped some ink with the nib, then closed his eyes softly. He had decided what words to write." This sounds incongruous to me. If he closes his eyes, he's probably thinking, so he probably hasn't decided what words to write.
I would have expected the ending to be something more like "He dipped some ink with the nib, then closed his eyes softly, thinking." (or: ..."lost in thought".) Depending on what you want to say, I would have expected something like "Then suddenly he opened his eyes again and looked at the paper. He had decided what words to write."
In summary, here's my version (but keep in mind that the ending involves some ideas from my own imagination, which might not be exactly what you want to say:
Keigo had been grinding ink for quite a while; the sound of the ink stick grinding on the inkstone reigned over the six-tatami room. Not a sound could be heard from the next room, where his wife had been decorating the shrine. He wondered if she was finished.
After finding the color strong enough, Keigo stopped, put the ink stick down and took up a calligraphy brush. He dipped some ink with the nib, then closed his eyes softly, lost in thought. Then suddenly he opened his eyes again and looked at the paper. He had decided what words to write.