Junesun wrote:我每个星期二早上六点起床。六点二十五分我和我家人一起吃早饭。然后我跟我父亲一起坐汽车去Duisburg。他去工作，我去大学。我从八点半有课，所以我到D 的时候还早。第一课，从八点半到十点，是信息学。第二课，从十点到十一点半是翻译法文的课。然后我快去食堂吃中饭。我没有很多时间吃饭因为第三课十二点开始。十六点才下课。我累坐公共汽车去火车站，坐火车去Moers，坐公共汽车去Ka-Li。 从Duisubrg大学到我家去要一个半小时。我在家的时候马上休息，不做作业。上网聊天比做作业很有意思。
It's generally very good and I didn't spot many real mistakes. Only a few points:
It depends what sort of course it is. Here it sound like "translate french classes". You should say, if this is French-German, "法德翻译课", if this is Chinese-French, "汉法翻译课"... etc.
By 中饭 you certainly mean lunch? That's indeed one of the meanings, but be careful as it can also mean "Chinese food". "午饭" is prefered since it means only lunch. This is not a mistake obviously.
Here there is a little problem. Keep in mind that (except in some complex sentences) Chinese will always mention the cause first and the consequence next. I recommand to say "因为第三课十二点开始" first.
Also, "我没有很多时间吃饭" is a bit odd and has a western flavour, prefer a sentence like "我吃饭(的)时间比较短/很短".
Chinese almost never use 24h time. It's better to say "下午四点下课" or even "四点下课" as it's rather obvious with the context, and also because it is unlikely you finish class at 4 a.m.
Compliments on your use of 才 which is very accurate here.
Here you probably didn't mean to use the verb "累坐" which means something I don't really know how to explain in English.
If you mean "I'm tired to take the bus to go to the rail station", you should say "(我)坐公共汽车去火车站使我很累". I believe you probably want to say "when I'm tired I take the bus to to the station", this would be "我累时/我累的时候 坐公共汽车去火车站".
That's much better without "去".
Here if you mean "when I arrive at home I rest immediately", you should use "到" instead of "在". It is a bit like saying "when I am at home I rest immediately", but the use of "马上" involves you 'are' not at home but you just arrived there.
Another correction about the style, I would say: "我一到家就休息、不做作业。" = As soon as I get home I rest and I don't do my homework.
I don't know if you know that way to use "一" + verb + "就" + verb, which involves a quasi-simultaneity of two actions, usually translated as: "as soon as" + verb + (nothing) + verb.
Here "很" is not adequate; you cannot use it in a comparison and have either to replace it with "更", or write nothing.
This is something many foreigners have problems with, I remember that friends who studied also in advanced level still had that problem.
Let me give some examples:
我学得比你好。I study better than you. (standard comparison)
我学得比你更好。This is more or less the same meaning; perhaps the degree is a bit higher than the previous sentence, it's usually used to emphacise on the object of the comparison.
我学得比你好多。I study much better than you. Now there is obviously a much higher level. Note that "比你更好多" is not correct.
Well, as you noticed, there are not many mistakes, rather problems with style (like me in English
), and the mistakes can be easily corrected in the future. Congratulations for it, I encourage you to keep on writing; why not arguing, trying to raise a debate on a given topic next time?
You can probably argue in Chinese already, and that would be the best way for you to improve your written Chinese.
Sorry if I am not clear with my explanations, it's already very late and I'm a bit asleep.