Lauren wrote:I just can't stand to watch/listen to cis men for stuff like this anymore. Haven't really been able to stand cis men in any way at all lately. So I do my best to avoid them.
Seriously, though, since you're transgender and all (it does matter in this context; this is literally one of the few contexts where it does), I'm going to have to repeat Vijay's question: how do
you know if they're a man or not? I mean, no offence, but unless they specifically state that they're male eg. by having a male name, then judging by their voice (or appearance if they have a facecam) is sexist and cisnormative and stuff, right? Also, what about trans-closeted people? And what if the man you're referring to used to be a woman? Isn't calling them cis not only offensive but contributes to the FTM oppression that everyone is always going on about despite how it seems that FTM are generally ignored while MTF are called all kinds of shit and threatened because they're trying to "trick men into being gay" and as a result get raped and murdered every single day?
In case you're going to call me a shitlord who doesn't give a shit, that's true, but the fact is that if that's your response to any "problematic questions" regarding gender identity and such, it really just sounds like you
don't give a shit except when it's directly related to your personal wellbeing; I think that's perfectly understandable and much better than the alternative, and I'm the same way about things, and I think more people should be able to not give a shit about things that really don't matter in 99% of all contexts (such as whether a person is cis or trans; I mean, c'mon, transgender is called transgender with the prefix "trans-" and in a perfect world nobody would be trans since technology would have reached the level where literally not even doctors could not tell the difference, thus transgender people would be cis once they take the step to transition), but for someone who obviously does at least pretend to care about these things... well...
I mean, you can obviously do whatever you want and I don't want to sound like an asshole, but avoiding cis men is literally impossible in damn near every context and is only going to lead to marginalisation and sexist extremism in the long run. Think about how, if you and a bunch of other transgender/non-binary/whatever people create a society in which you isolate yourselves from all cis men for, say, a year, and then you come across one walking down the street or something. How would you react? You've lost all tolerance for cis men and our inherently oppressive behaviour like not having a problem with the fact that 99% of the world's population is cis, and if a legit cis man happened to smile at you in a grocery store... well, you'd probably assume that he's going to rape you, right? I hear people already do that all the time in America, even without having isolated themselves from cis men, and post on tumblr about how they think they should have the legal right to kill any cis man who looks at them... like... what do you think would happen? Because, even if you personally are not the kind of person who thinks it should be ok to kill a man for smiling at you, if you isolate yourself from cis men, you are also most likely going to isolate yourself from cis women except for lesbians because the majority of cis women have the same worldview as cis men whether you like it or not, and as such you will by definition end up hearing only one side of the story; the story of oppression. If you hear "he raped me, then his friend raped me, and then his father raped me, and then his friend's father raped me, I MEAN THEY LITERALLY PHYSICALLY LOOKED AT ME" (and, in case you don't know, there are a lot of people out there who include that in the definition of rape) every day for a while, you will start to believe it's true; you'll think that a man looking at you is the exact same as him violently forcing you to have sex with him; and that only leads to paranoia and prejudice, which results in discrimination and oppression.
Now, I know according to feminism men can't be discriminated against or oppressed, but that's because of societal attitudes. Even if it was true that it does not constitute discrimination for you to not associate with a man because he's a man, what if that became the norm? It might never become the norm, most likely never will, but it would absolutely be discrimination. And, it already is the norm in some parts of the internet, so the mindset is already out there and it's influencing more and more people. As more and more women get government positions (which I believe is a good thing), it's more and more likely that one of them will be a radical feminist who will end up proposing a law to allow any non-cis and/or non-man to kill any cis man for looking at them. Will it pass? No. Absolutely not in hell... but the more and more likely it will become that such a law is going to be proposed, and similar laws that are not as harsh will
be passed and already have
been passed. It may not bother you as it won't affect you, but what about the people it does affect? Aren't all people equal? Or are cis men not included in equality because we're "not even people" like many of the most radical feminists are proclaiming? Do you agree that we should be put to camps until we learn to behave like humans
and that 90% of us should be killed just for being cis men
? I'm going to assume you don't, but there are more and more people out there who do, and they are getting louder and louder and gaining more and more political power; sure, they may still be far from even opening their mouth without getting laughed at, but it's inevitable that eventually they'll have positions in government jobs and the justice system and whatnot.