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Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-07-20, 21:46
by linguoboy
IpseDixit wrote:I feel annoyed that they aren't doing anything whatsover to create such a world.

I don't disagree that coming out is the most effective way to do this. But do you think it's the only way to do this?

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-07-21, 0:23
by vijayjohn
It's possible that I'm not aware enough of how important this is. I'm more okay with coming out to some of my friends and family than to others. I came out on this forum and I believe a couple of others because people in these environments are relatively likely to accept it. I hesitantly came out to one guy at work because he asked me about my sexuality. I'm pretty sure some people at work are pretty homophobic, though, even though some others are also openly gay, so I'm definitely afraid of being judged for that. Way too many people in my life have way too many excuses to judge me; I don't need one more.

I don't think I'll ever tell my family because some of my relatives are homophobic, some are extremely homophobic, some may already know (and I kinda regret them finding out), and some are blabbermouths. I'm worried that at least if the extreme homophobes ever find out, they may create a lot of needless family drama I'd rather not have (trying to forbid their kids from seeing me, not letting me visit, etc.), and obviously, I don't want the blabbermouths to blurt it out to the homophobes. Especially not the extreme homophobes!

I kind of sympathize with not talking about sex with people you're not having sex with. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: For me, who I'd like to have sex with isn't a big part of my identity. My ethnicity and cultural background are way, waaaaaaaaaaay more important to me, not to mention far more obvious.

It may also be worth mentioning that I hadn't even come out to myself until, like, a few years ago. How am I supposed to come out to other people if I don't even understand my own sexuality to begin with?

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-08-24, 15:53
by md0
So, what's the sweet-spot of gayness for Austrian border controls?
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-45290800
Austrian officials rejected an Iraqi migrant's asylum application because he was too "girlish", local media say.

Last week, activists said that an 18-year-old Afghan asylum seeker had his application rejected because he did not "act or dress" like a homosexual.


Edit: More details https://www.gaystarnews.com/article/aus ... vably-gay/

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-08-27, 17:41
by Lur
Ugh!

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-08-28, 16:52
by linguoboy
What does it mean when you ask why someone from the personnel department at work was put on your workplace's "diversity committee" and you're told "because they're an LGBTQ ally" and you had no inkling of this even though you're LGBTQ?

Possibly not asking for a friend.

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-09-06, 18:17
by md0
TIL male homosexual acts were illegal in India until today.

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-09-06, 23:54
by vijayjohn
I didn't know that changed today, but yeah, there was a buggery law passed down from the British. I've posted about it before, but not as much as about my understanding of Indian attitudes towards homosexuality (neither of which I talk about all that much in the first place).

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-09-07, 13:43
by Osias
Why weren't all the laws passed by the British invalidated after independence? :hmm:

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-09-07, 13:56
by Yasna
Osias wrote:Why weren't all the laws passed by the British invalidated after independence? :hmm:

Because some of the laws were eminently reasonable?

Bengal Sati Regulation, 1829

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-09-07, 14:46
by md0
Osias wrote:Why weren't all the laws passed by the British invalidated after independence? :hmm:


Common Law is our legal system. If all colonial laws were invalidated, all former colonies would have to start from scratch, with no continuity and I don't see an easy choice between recognising British laws for all circumstances that arose before the British laws were replaced with new laws, or retroactively changing the obligations of citizens.

It makes much more sense to replace laws as needed.

---

We inherited the same British law in Cyprus, and we repealed it in the early 2000s.

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-09-07, 14:48
by linguoboy
Osias wrote:Why weren't all the laws passed by the British invalidated after independence?

Was this what the Brazilians did when they broke free of Portugal? As md0 says, it seems impractical.

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-09-07, 15:54
by Osias
linguoboy wrote:
Osias wrote:Why weren't all the laws passed by the British invalidated after independence?

Was this what the Brazilians did when they broke free of Portugal?
I ask the same question. I even ask why the empire laws weren't invalidated when the republic was established. This week there was a buzz about the Lei Áurea here and I read it again on a government website. It states slavery is banished by the princess isabel in name of Your Majesty the Emperor and I was like "WTF!". The word of a Emperor is still valid today? I know, as you said, it would be impractical otherwise, but still... WTF.

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-09-08, 3:22
by vijayjohn
Osias wrote:Why weren't all the laws passed by the British invalidated after independence? :hmm:

Because that was the only involvement the British had in some of these laws?

In the region of Bengal in the 19th century, during the colonial period, it was not uncommon for a four-year-old girl to become a widow overnight because four was a common age for girls to get married and (at least some) men could marry as many girls as they wanted and even get married on their own deathbeds. Widows were extremely oppressed and never allowed to marry. A local reformer named Ishwar Chandra Vidyasagar began publicly calling for the legalization of widow remarriage so that widows could have at least a little bit of freedom. This idea was so controversial some people plotted to murder him. He circulated a petition to gain popular support, only for his opponents to circulate a counter-petition with many more signatures. Luckily for him, the British government in Bengal viewed him as a progressive and legalized widow remarriage.

So this was a law that was proposed by an Indian and defended to the death by an Indian for the sake of other Indians. It's just that the administration that made it into a law happened to be British at the time.

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-09-08, 3:37
by Osias
Yet, as you are telling us, it was the British authority that made the law real.

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-09-09, 7:46
by vijayjohn
But so what?

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-09-09, 13:26
by Osias
So countries and laws are weird.

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-09-10, 6:00
by vijayjohn
Fair enough! :)

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-09-19, 4:25
by md0
https://cyprus-mail.com/2018/09/18/gay- ... ansphobia/

Gay dating app Grindr has announced a “zero tolerance policy” towards racism, transphobia and other discrimination on the platform as it looks to crack down on abusive behaviour within the LGBT dating scene.

The company said it would ban users who used hateful language and may even remove options allowing users to filter potential dates by age and race in a bid to tackle the issue.

“Any language that is intended to openly discriminate against characters and traits, like infamously, ‘No fats, no femmes, no Asians’…that isn’t going to be tolerated any more,” said Landen Zumwalt, Grindr’s head of communications.


Hm... I wonder how my "no fash" bio line will fare under the new rules.
And it's not clear if removing filtering by race is a platform wide decision (very welcome, and preferred to banning bios), or if it's just a punishment (in which case it's silly).

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-10-11, 21:25
by linguoboy
So Facebook has added a feature under Life Events which allows you post a "coming out date". While it's doubtless well-intentioned, it shows a lack of understanding of how coming out really operates in a world that defaults to cis-gender straightness. On average, I probably "come out" as gay about once a week. Making it a "life event" reinforces the idea that it's this singular transformative choice as opposed to an ongoing negotiation with heteronormative society.

Re: LGBTQA+ issues

Posted: 2018-10-11, 22:15
by Johanna
linguoboy wrote:So Facebook has added a feature under Life Events which allows you post a "coming out date". While it's doubtless well-intentioned, it shows a lack of understanding of how coming out really operates in a world that defaults to cis-gender straightness. On average, I probably "come out" as gay about once a week. Making it a "life event" reinforces the idea that it's this singular transformative choice as opposed to an ongoing negotiation with heteronormative society.

Well said.

A lot of people never do the big reveal thing either, they just refuse to censor themselves anymore, or they never even started doing it in the first place. That's how a lot of people about my age and younger treat it around here, myself included, even in a small-ish rural town like mine.