Personal Poetry

A place for everyone to have discussions about literature, classical and contemporary.

Moderator:Forum Administrators

User avatar
Emandir
Posts:6597
Joined:2002-11-21, 17:37
Real Name:Jean-Luc Bengler
Gender:male
Location:France
Country:FRFrance (France)
Contact:
Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Emandir » 2008-10-08, 14:48

Draven wrote:
Emandir wrote:the uprightness of his manhood

:shocked: :bounce: :burning:

Eh eh! I admit it: I'm quite proud of this one! :blush: :roll: :whistle: :mrgreen: :silly:
Language is the best way men have found to misunderstand each other. Lycodoxos

@Emandir

User avatar
Trapy
Posts:1773
Joined:2006-08-09, 17:59
Real Name:Trapy
Gender:male
Location:UK / USA
Country:GBUnited Kingdom (United Kingdom)

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Trapy » 2008-10-25, 19:16

Trying to use make use of my [very] limited vocabulary of Ainu. As I can barely put a sentence together with only 20 words, I decided, poetry is one good way to make use of few words, but still send across a message. So, here is my paltry attempt to communicate [something].

[ai]
Acapo ek, Ak iruska.
Acapo hok humpe. Ak cis.

Humpe yan. Humpe takne.
Humpe Kosne. Ak Iruska.


[en]
Uncle comes, younger brother is angry.
Uncle buys whale. Younger brother cries.

Whale rises. Whale is short.
Whale is light, younger brother is angry.
"and now every toilet will burn to ashes!""

User avatar
Emandir
Posts:6597
Joined:2002-11-21, 17:37
Real Name:Jean-Luc Bengler
Gender:male
Location:France
Country:FRFrance (France)
Contact:

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Emandir » 2008-10-25, 20:02

Wow! I like that! I used to make, long ago, the same with languages I didn't know (and still don't by the way) like Bulgarian. I think that you're more "aware" of sounds when you don't know well a language, I mean, it's hard to feel the sounds of the language you're using everyday, without even thinking about how you build a sentence... And maybe that's why I like to write poems in English, because it's fresher than French for me....
_____

BAD WEEK -
LOW DAYS
SICK SOUR SOUL
IN AN OLD ILL BODY
MESSED UP -
CRUMPLED
NOTHING MATTERS
THOUGH HARK MY HEART
THE SADDEST SQUEALING NOTES
TOSSING AWAY A DEAD OMEN
WHILST THE PEOPLE
OUT OF BOREDOM
GO STRAIGHT & ASKEW
HERE THERE & ANYWHERE
RESTLESS IN ANGST
TO FILL THE HOLLOW HOURS
WITH BLANK GESTICULATIONS -
WHY FOR ME NO WAY TO
UNABLE INCAPABLE UNARMED
DOOMED TO MIND ROAM
& BATTLE THE WIND
LIKE A STERILE MILL

day one, year 593rd a. Agincourt.
Language is the best way men have found to misunderstand each other. Lycodoxos

@Emandir

User avatar
Trapy
Posts:1773
Joined:2006-08-09, 17:59
Real Name:Trapy
Gender:male
Location:UK / USA
Country:GBUnited Kingdom (United Kingdom)

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Trapy » 2008-10-25, 23:49

Emandir wrote: I used to make, long ago, the same with languages I didn't know

That is almost written in Iambic Dodecatameter! A true poet :yep:
"and now every toilet will burn to ashes!""

User avatar
Emandir
Posts:6597
Joined:2002-11-21, 17:37
Real Name:Jean-Luc Bengler
Gender:male
Location:France
Country:FRFrance (France)
Contact:

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Emandir » 2008-10-26, 8:48

Oh, you're talking about something that I don't really know - French has no real stress (though we could discuss about that) and makes no real distinction between long and short vowels (and we could discuss about this too), hence the peculiarity of its poetry, based mainly upon the number of syllables of a line and rhymes. And I often write in alexandrine without even noticing it....
Language is the best way men have found to misunderstand each other. Lycodoxos

@Emandir

User avatar
Trapy
Posts:1773
Joined:2006-08-09, 17:59
Real Name:Trapy
Gender:male
Location:UK / USA
Country:GBUnited Kingdom (United Kingdom)

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Trapy » 2008-10-26, 14:18

ah, you can see on wiki here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iambic_pentameter

It is a system where you use stressed and unstressed words to make a "moving" or "up and down" sound when the word is said. Shakespeare is famous for using it. (Dodecatameter being just a small variation of the Pentameter)
"and now every toilet will burn to ashes!""

User avatar
Trapy
Posts:1773
Joined:2006-08-09, 17:59
Real Name:Trapy
Gender:male
Location:UK / USA
Country:GBUnited Kingdom (United Kingdom)

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Trapy » 2008-10-26, 21:05

-more practice with tetrameter, with more vocabulary!

[ai]
Hoskanuman ruyanpe as.
Numan kamuyhum as poro.

Tanto rera as ruy. Ak cis.
Hekaci isam. Komam as.


[en]
Two days ago rain fell.
Yesterday thunder struck loudly.

Today the wind blow strong. Younger brother cries.
Boy dies. Single leaf falls.
"and now every toilet will burn to ashes!""

Eoghan
Posts:2169
Joined:2008-06-12, 9:34
Gender:male
Country:GBUnited Kingdom (United Kingdom)

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Eoghan » 2008-11-15, 23:06

Image

For I have travelled
the length and breadth of
Yesterday
Searching for
Memories
Long lost in the
dwindling corridors
of Time

And as I travelled
I found a newborn child
a fragile memory
and held it in my hand, sang
it to Life
and pressed it against my heart
for it to taste
the coolness of life,
the rush of blood
through my veins

And so, with wings on my feet
I travelled as a
Dancing warrior
a naked, lonely soul
on the winds of
hundreds of
singing once-upon-a-times

And she called my name
Carried me
through the echoing valleys
of history
telling her story, my story
our story
And I was once again
her child
and she
the Memory
one shant forget

---


08.11.2008

User avatar
Sarabi
Posts:980
Joined:2003-03-11, 0:32
Location:Cer - sau iad - nu ştiu sigur
Country:USUnited States (United States)

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Sarabi » 2008-11-16, 3:25

Emandir, we started discussing poetry in my writing class recently, and this is how my professor defined poetry: memorable language. That's the definition I was looking for in our earlier discussion. I finally know what poetry is in two words. How complicated. Ask people what poetry is, and they will search until they fall off the side of the earth..... and then my professor explains one day, and it's like realizing the earth is round. :D

Trapy wrote:[ai]
Hoskanuman ruyanpe as.
Numan kamuyhum as poro.

Tanto rera as ruy. Ak cis.
Hekaci isam. Komam as.

[en]
Two days ago rain fell.
Yesterday thunder struck loudly.

Today the wind blow strong. Younger brother cries.
Boy dies. Single leaf falls.

This is beautiful. :) The subtlety and simplicity echoes of childhood.
Philyra Games (språkspill)

B1+ (no)(fr)(es) A1-A2 (ro)(zh)(it)(sw)

User avatar
Emandir
Posts:6597
Joined:2002-11-21, 17:37
Real Name:Jean-Luc Bengler
Gender:male
Location:France
Country:FRFrance (France)
Contact:

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Emandir » 2008-11-16, 9:06

Sarabi wrote:How complicated. Ask people what poetry is, and they will search until they fall off the side of the earth.....

How true! I recently read a whole book (didn't I already speak about it?) about what is poetry, quoting hundreds of definitions and the conclusion is that there are no satisflying one...
About your professor's, well, of course it's a good one, excepted that it can be applied to other kinds of speech - just to talk about an author we already discussed about here, Kerouac's language is memorable - and taking language in a wider acceptation (as French word langage vs. langue) can't we say that Dance is also a memorable language (but isn't it also a kind of poetry? a body language, a body poetrY?)
My personal conclusion is that every definition of poetry is suitable - and how poetic poetry's indefinabilty! ;)
Language is the best way men have found to misunderstand each other. Lycodoxos

@Emandir

User avatar
Emandir
Posts:6597
Joined:2002-11-21, 17:37
Real Name:Jean-Luc Bengler
Gender:male
Location:France
Country:FRFrance (France)
Contact:

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Emandir » 2008-11-23, 19:40

Idéogramme urbain,
hanzi céleste de l'élévation
impliquant de l'humain la petitesse contrariée
et ce désir frivole d'être plus près des dieux !
Droites et courbes en mouvement
d'en haut et d'en bas mêlant les orbites compliquées
symbole de la vie portée jusqu'à la mort,
de l'homme qui n'est rien sans un souffle des cieux,
droiture empêchée, à peine pleine et déjà fléchissante
mais que d'honneurs et de combats
contre les vents du monde et les tempêtes intestines !
Tour métallique de Babel pointant son dard au Paradis,
langage universel adulé par les foules,
signe conventionnel mariant les opposés,
caractère secret d'un occulte jargon qui singe le divin,
et du frêle bipède, enfin, l'allégorie moqueuse
visible depuis l'horizon,
narguant sa soif de perfection,
son désir de sublimation,
sans pourtant parvenir à bien masquer
ce qu'en sa déficience il garde de sublime !

à D.,

Pont Lagrand, le 23 novembre 2008.



Urban ideogram,
celestial hanzi for rise
implying of human the thwarted smallness
and this flimsy desire to be closer to gods!
Straight and curved moving lines
from above and below mixing the intricate orbits
symbol of the prone life up till death,
of man who is nothing without a breath of sky,
impeded uprightness, barely full and bending already
but how many honours and fights
against the worldly winds and inner storms!
Metallic Babel tower pointing its sting towards Heaven,
universal language worshiped by the crowds,
conventional sign uniting contraries,
secret character of an occult jargon feigning the divine,
and of the frail biped, at last, mocking allegory
visible from the horizon,
taunting his thirst for perfection,
his desire of sublimation,
without though succeeding well to mask
what in his deficiency he still has of sublime.

to D.,

Pont Lagrand, November 23, 2008.

_____

Not really sure about this translation (any suggestion welcome!) but watch the PICTURE that inspired me!
Language is the best way men have found to misunderstand each other. Lycodoxos

@Emandir

User avatar
culúrien
Posts:4742
Joined:2005-07-15, 1:53
Gender:female
Country:USUnited States (United States)

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby culúrien » 2008-11-24, 1:16

Emandir wrote:
Not really sure about this translation (any suggestion welcome!) but watch the PICTURE that inspired me!
'

You don't watch a picture, you see/look at it :)
استیسی

User avatar
Emandir
Posts:6597
Joined:2002-11-21, 17:37
Real Name:Jean-Luc Bengler
Gender:male
Location:France
Country:FRFrance (France)
Contact:

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Emandir » 2008-11-24, 7:08

culúrien wrote:You don't watch a picture, you see/look at it :)

Are you kidding, Stacy?
I'm not an expert, but the basics I know, I know them well (and may I remind you that I began to learn English before you were even born? :P)

And both Cambridge and Oxford are on my side! ;)
Language is the best way men have found to misunderstand each other. Lycodoxos

@Emandir

KingHarvest
Posts:4168
Joined:2008-03-21, 5:46
Gender:male
Location:New York
Country:USUnited States (United States)

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby KingHarvest » 2008-11-24, 19:51

No, they're not. You're missing the most crucial part of the definitions:

1 [I or T] to look at something for a period of time, especially something that is changing or moving:

to look at sb/sth for a time, paying attention to what happens:

To say that you're watching something implies that something is happening during the watching. Nothing can happen in a picture as it is, by definition, stationary and unchanging. Saying "watch a picture" sounds horribly stilted and unnatural.
Most men are rather stupid, and most of those who are not stupid are, consequently, rather vain.
-A.E. Housman

Eoghan
Posts:2169
Joined:2008-06-12, 9:34
Gender:male
Country:GBUnited Kingdom (United Kingdom)

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Eoghan » 2008-11-24, 20:03

KingHarvest wrote:No, they're not. You're missing the most crucial part of the definitions:

1 [I or T] to look at something for a period of time, especially something that is changing or moving:

to look at sb/sth for a time, paying attention to what happens:

To say that you're watching something implies that something is happening during the watching. Nothing can happen in a picture as it is, by definition, stationary and unchanging. Saying "watch a picture" sounds horribly stilted and unnatural.


Not if Emandir is a wizard and used to "watching pictures" in the Daily Prophet... :P

User avatar
Emandir
Posts:6597
Joined:2002-11-21, 17:37
Real Name:Jean-Luc Bengler
Gender:male
Location:France
Country:FRFrance (France)
Contact:

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Emandir » 2008-11-24, 21:36

KingHarvest wrote:No, they're not. You're missing the most crucial part of the definitions:

1 [I or T] to look at something for a period of time, especially something that is changing or moving:

As far as I know especially does not mean exclusively!

And, by the way, I'm really proud to be stilted and unnatural - after all, that's the way I write in my own language...
Language is the best way men have found to misunderstand each other. Lycodoxos

@Emandir

User avatar
Zorba
Posts:3169
Joined:2006-03-24, 21:09

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Zorba » 2008-11-24, 22:21

The others are right: You don't "watch a picture" in English, you "look at" it. "Gaze", "stare", "peer into" if you want you to be poetic. It is a simple matter of collocation.

You do "watch" a movie and at first that's what I thought you were referring to, because "picture" is a (somewhat dated) word for movie or film in English. So there is a danger of miscommunication here. I expected your link to lead to a Youtube video, not a still photograph.

Eoghan
Posts:2169
Joined:2008-06-12, 9:34
Gender:male
Country:GBUnited Kingdom (United Kingdom)

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Eoghan » 2008-12-29, 20:49

Krig

Ur hennes ögon
rann rött blod
brinnande glöd och tusen tårar av brustna sånger
hennes ögonbryn liknade ett anfallande jasplan
det attackerade hennes långa höknäsa
och när man följde dess flykt med ögonen
landade det med en suck på hennes
likblå läppar
där inga ord längre förmådde
tysta det utdragna skrik som
en gång sprungit ur hennes hals,
nu avhuggen, blottad, död
Och hennes kropp var våldtagen av repetition och
hämnd på hämnd
på tusen hämndars hämnd
och ingen visste längre vart hennes fötter
vandrat när de stoppats
in i soldaternas blå liksäckar
där de som inte valt att
dödas
mördas för en flagga
se folk bli symboler för ondska
och sedan krossas under
de tre dödarnas fötter
när slutet kommit och ingen
längre
kan se varför
eller svara på frågan
som aldrig
ställts
Hennes bröst var vita som liljor
så som bara hud utan liv
kan spegla pergamentets
ord
och vid hennes sida stod
ett ensamt barn
utan moder utan
framtid
som flytt soldatens gevär och
spridit sin aska över krigets öken
och på ena sidan står han som aldrig velat
och på andra sidan står
han som aldrig velat
och i mitten dör hoppet
när kulorna sliter livet ur
de sista som kunnat ena de sargade flaggorna
och ingen vill ge upp för
ännu har ingen duva
lämnat en kvist som förmått
slå rot för ingen vill
ta sig tid att låta kvinnan
vattna dess rötter
och vårda dess späda blad
tills en oas har slukat öknen
för vem har tid att
binda vänskapsband när
det går snabbare att ladda
geväret som ger det kalla
stålets makt
att äta de första och de sistas själar innifrån
medan hennes ögon fortsätter att fälla
Döda Havet över kala marker

roger100
Posts:249
Joined:2005-06-04, 19:41
Real Name:Pelgrims Roger
Gender:male
Location:Rotselaar
Country:BEBelgium (België / Belgique)

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby roger100 » 2009-01-31, 20:40

Dresden 1 (German)

der Sieger kommt,
schnell und unvermutet,
aus der Luft.
das Hochdruckgebiet
ist atemberaubend
und glühend
sehe ich meine Geliebte
aufsteigen,
bis eine nie vergessene Vergangenheit.

Dresden 1 (Dutch)

de overwinnaar komt,
snel en onverwacht,
uit de lucht.
de hoge druk
is adembenemend,
en vurig
zie ik mijn geliefde
opstijgen
tot een nooit vergeten verleden.

Dresden 2 (Dutch)

het vuur raast langs de hemel,
vult straten, pleinen
en riolen. niemand ontkomt er aan,
adembenemend als het is,
aan deze hel en hitte,
geen vrouw, geen kind, geen man
wordt er gespaard.
onvoorstelbaar is de kracht
die wordt gelost door de nacht
van rechtvaardigheid.

geblakerd staan zij nog overeind,
wat eens waren de muren van de kathedraal.

Dresden 3 (German)

irgendwann zwischen nacht und nebel
sausten die bomben durch die strassen.
sie nahmen alles mit, nur ich,
der augenzeuge, bin stehengeblieben.
niemand hat’s gemerkt.

feuerherde brennten durch die regenwölke,
aschenbecher überfüllt von dem verschwundenen sein.
trotzdem wird jetzt behauptet,
ss sollten nur ein paar tausende gewesen sein.


Roger

Eoghan
Posts:2169
Joined:2008-06-12, 9:34
Gender:male
Country:GBUnited Kingdom (United Kingdom)

Re: Personal Poetry

Postby Eoghan » 2009-02-04, 19:05

So, I've been reading Spencer, Milton and Shakespeare at uni, and well, they were true writers, yet sort of irritating at times. Anyway, here's my attempt at a sonnet, obviously I don't know how to write a sonnet, but hey, I tried.

Thou art as rare as an Eden’s flower
A gentle being, a phoenix in flight
Though I admire thee and long for thy heart
I’d honour thee like a king his country
For certain flowers are not to be plucked
Their beauty best behold where once they grew
And yet, thy petals have me mesmerized
That in front of thee I may fade away
And, hark soul; my life would have been fulfilled
The poet grasping for words, lost on sea
As no word yet written would suit thee well
Silently I would whisper in thy ear
Thyne I wish to be, and forever am


Return to “Literature”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 7 guests