Kyr wrote:Hello to all of you! Can I present myself? I am Judith Meyer. I am 21 years old. I come from Kamp Linfort. This is a nice town in Germany. I study French philology and literature at the university of Duisburg. I study also business studies and "computational linguistics’”. And I have been studying Dutch since only 6 days at home. I understand Dutch very well, but I cannot write it yet.
Do you have any brothers or sisters? I have one brother, but I have no sister. My brother is 18 years old. His name is Jens and he is still at school. My parents’ names are Georg and Ursula.
Just a few details, no serious mistakes.
Kyr you did a good job translating and dor&da a good job correcting it, but still there are a few ways of making it better in English (American Eng.). Also, I hope I don't offend anyone by doing this because I don't know what dialect you are studying.
Here's how I'd have said it (but w/o the *):
Hello everybody!* Let me present myself. I am Judit h Meyer, I am 21 years old and live in Kamp Linfort.** It is a nice town in Germany. I study French philogy and literature at the University of Duisburg. I also take business studies and computational linguistics.*** And, I have been studying for only six days at home.**** I understand Dutch very well, but cannot write it yet.*****
Do you have any brothers or sisters? I have a brother, but no sisters.****** He is 18. His name is Jens and is still in school.******* My parents' names are Georg and Ursula.
* to all of you can be replace with one word everybody
** combining all three sentences into one makes the paragraph flow better, also a comma may be added after old (but it's optional in this situation)
*** using the verb to take is idiomatic but is better choice because studies is a noun dervived from the verb to study and it doesn't sound as choppy and the word also comes before or after the sentence or after the subject
**** in this case for is a better choice because since refers more to a specific date
***** I doesn't need to be repeated because both verbs have the same subject
****** a is better than one because that is her only sibling it would be different if say she had two sisters and one brother, also, negated nouns are usually in the plural and same as before the subject is the same as well as the verb so no need to repeat it
******* use in as opposed to at using at makes it sound like he is at school (at this very moment) doing work or some after school activity
Good job both of you, but let's get back to learning Dutch not working on our English. Thanks for taking time to read this too.
Hope it'll help....