It is clearly seen that in the European countries the percentage of use of alternative means of transport...

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i_yre_b
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Joined:2020-07-20, 19:06
Real Name:Anastasia
It is clearly seen that in the European countries the percentage of use of alternative means of transport...

Postby i_yre_b » 2021-03-16, 10:11

Hello, everyone!

I'm checking a table description for the IELTS writing part 1 task.

Please, help me correct this sentence:

It is clearly seen that(,) in the European countries(,) the percentage of use of alternative means of transport instead of cars is higher than in Canada, where people use them in the majority of cases.


Does the sentence sound ok?

Is it clear what 'them' refers to?

Do we need the commas in brackets?

Thank you in advance. :)
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Last edited by i_yre_b on 2021-03-16, 17:41, edited 1 time in total.

azhong

Re: It is clearly seen that in European countries the percentage of use of alternative means of transport instead of car

Postby azhong » 2021-03-16, 12:56

(Hi. I am not a native speaker. And I try to change your sentence as less as I can. In fact, I have little confidence in my sentence. Let's wait together more comments from other people .)

It is clearly seen that in the European countries(,) the percentage of using alternative means of transportation rather than the car is higher than that in Canada, where people use the latter in a majority of cases.

Note: the first comma is unnecessary. The second is originally necessary, but because your phrase in the European countries is short enough, it can then also be left out while not confusing the readers.

My references:
1. An example sentence from the dictionary:
"In Los Angeles many companies encourage their employees to use alternative means of transportation, rather than the car."

2. I didn't change it although I've read a discussion about a majority of cases.

i_yre_b
Posts:2
Joined:2020-07-20, 19:06
Real Name:Anastasia

Re: It is clearly seen that in European countries the percentage of use of alternative means of transport instead of car

Postby i_yre_b » 2021-03-16, 17:51

azhong wrote:(Hi. I am not a native speaker. And I try to change your sentence as less as I can. In fact, I have little confidence in my sentence. Let's wait together more comments from other people .)

It is clearly seen that in the European countries(,) the percentage of using alternative means of transportation rather than the car is higher than that in Canada, where people use the latter in a majority of cases.

Note: the first comma is unnecessary. The second is originally necessary, but because your phrase in the European countries is short enough, it can then also be left out while not confusing the readers.

My references:
1. An example sentence from the dictionary:
"In Los Angeles many companies encourage their employees to use alternative means of transportation, rather than the car."

2. I didn't change it although I've read a discussion about a majority of cases.


Thank you, azhong!

I think using 'latter' in this case is a great idea to avoid confusion!


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