DOs and DON'Ts in your countries

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CoBB
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Re: How do Hungarians celebrate ?

Postby CoBB » 2004-10-13, 19:07

Weldal wrote:How do Hungarians celebrate anything while drinking beer ? :?

Not everyone cares about this 'rule'. Those who do can still use wine, champagne or some stronger stuff for this purpose. :)

When there's a celebration there's usually one big common clinking (mostly with champagne), and we just wish good health ('Egészségedre!') when drinking a glass of beer or anything with someone at another point.
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Postby Kangoo » 2004-10-14, 21:01

I just know if we would use some Do´s from our countries in Muslim countries, we will be killed and stoned in the name of Killer Allah

If Arabs and Turks celebrate their To Do`s in our country, althought they are not to Dos here, they will be rewarded by some "Gutmenschen" Gutmensch is someone who still believes in the multicultural society and calling all the persons, not very convinced of that and all persons who doesn´t comply their ideas Nazis
"You can´t teach an old dog new tricks" :-)

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Postby Urbanbigf00t » 2004-10-30, 20:01

A few notes on both Russian and Israeli Dos and Don'ts (since I've had some time to study both)
Russia

NEVER extend your hand in greeting over a doorstep. This originates from an old beief that such a handshake might cause a rivalry or dispute. While not observed by all Russians, this tradition is particularly strong as you tavel to the east and toward Caucasian region. There you may find yourself being pulled rather strongly by your hand over the doorstep by the host.
When stepping on the somebody's foot by mistake, you should apologise off course, but you might have to offer your own foot to step on, in order to prevent a possible dispute. This depends on the measure of closeness between you and the other person, but between friends this should sometimes be done. When offered a foot to step on, do so (lightly :D ).
When poured vodka, it would be a particularly stong insult to the host not to drink, or leave some in the glass. You may excuse yourself from alcohol before the round is being poured, but when it's in the glass, there is nothing you can do about it, but drink. Do not drink alone while in company, unless you announce that you like to drink to somebody's health.
Drinking at work is not uncommon at all. Touring artists will be expected to "nalit'"-pour = extend an offering of a vodka bottle to a local crew. In this case it might be considered snobbish of them not to share a drink. This exchange is practiced between people of the same social level. In the whole, alcohol courtesy is a very complicated science in Russia, usually incomprehensible to foreighners. WHEN OFFERED, DRINK AND DON'T MAKE FACES :? !!!!! Russian minimum is 3 rounds, but you should take at least one. Women are usually excused from this, or offered wine instead.

Israel.

Take care while talking politics!!! An average Israeli takes his or her political views very seriously. Discussions are usually welcome and are considered a national sport, but respect should be stated of your opponent's views, before voicing your's. Also take great care while criticizing IDF (Israeli Defence Forces). Most Israeli men and women are ex regular soldiers, and many men are active reservists (such as myself), meaning that they participate in reserve duty yearly. While not all support gov. policy, most will defend the actuall soldiers to the extend of taking personal offence from a harsh statement by a non-Israeli. In general, note who you are talking to, before voicing harsh views. Also, do not pry into a person's military past. There are some things we keep even from our families.
Religion is also a heavy issue. You should check if a person is religious, before calling upon him or her on saturday. Phone calls are not allowed, so is turning ligt on or off, driving, preparing food, etc. Some religious Jews will not meet with you unless your head is covered (if you are jewish). Do not step into a place of worship without a head cover (goes for all). A religious Jew might not wish to enter a house that has no mezuzah (an installation of a perchment left of the door, with a prayer written on it). Do check if a person observes "kashruth"-eating only kosher food, before offering him or her any. Do not take offence, if you are refused on those grounds.
You can drop by ininvited, but call first. Most Israelis carry cellular phones, to the extent of presuming that you have one too. Remember that.
Most people will be informal with you instantly after meeting you. This is ok. Enjoy it. If you are called "ahi"-brother, it doesn't mean that you are a part of the family. An average Israeli will call anybody that.

That's ll for now.
Cheers....
Jake.

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Postby JackFrost » 2004-11-11, 1:00

Saaropean wrote:By the way: I once tried to explain the German expression Ich geh' mal für kleine Jungs/Mädchen to a South American guy, but obviously I failed, since he replied You can come to jail when you do that in my country... :lol:

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Man...talk about some dangers when speaking a language that is not your first. :mrgreen:





Ok, as for the United States. Well, at least for my state, Pennsylvania, since it can vary in each region.

It is unusual for friends (boy to girl, girl to girl) to kiss each other, and boy to boy friends handshaking while under 18-21, but over 18-21, it becomes more common. Hugging between friends is more common than kissing...boys and girls often do this together.

When you meet the person, a handshake is usually required regardless of age.

Kissing is also often restricted to relatives. Boys should kiss and hug their aunts, mother, girl cousins, and grandmothers, and handshake their uncles, boy cousins, and grandfathers. Girls should kiss and hug their grandparents, boy and girl cousins, father and mother, aunts and uncles.

You can see couple kissing on cheek quite often in public, it's unusual to see kissing with tongues, but it is not considered rude.

Holding hands is common and accepted.

Touching is rude, unless you want to tap the shoulder or arm to get the attention to let you know you dropped something, or for asking a question.

Keep your shoes on when coming in the house of a guest.

No burping or farting

Elbows off the table and use folks and knifes (unless you're eating sandwiches, breads, pizzas, and so on.)

It is rude not to hold the door for someone behind you. If you missed it, just simply try to catch the door and apologize, it at least shows respect and that you tried.

Call strangers Madam/Miss/Sir/Mister. I usually say "madam" for middled-aged and older ladies and "miss" for young ladies. And "mister" to men regardless of age. ;)

Drinking in public (outside bars, restaurants) is discouraged and not acceptable.

If the table is long and rectangle, the most senior member of the family (like a grandparent) or the host sit the front.

If you accidently bump someone, it is rude not to say "excuse me"

It is rude to talk loudly on cellphone inside public places.

It is rude for letting your kid scream loudly in restaurants.

Well, that's all I can think of.

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Postby rattylhed » 2004-11-14, 8:57

JackFrost wrote:
It is unusual for friends (boy to girl, girl to girl) to kiss each other, and boy to boy friends handshaking while under 18-21, but over 18-21, it becomes more common. Hugging between friends is more common than kissing...boys and girls often do this together.

You can see couple kissing on cheek quite often in public, it's unusual to see kissing with tongues, but it is not considered rude.


same up here in Canada... for friends (all ages), it is normal to hug each other. Older people though (good friends or family), they hug and kiss once on the cheek. Younger guys here shake hands and sort of half-hug while they are still shaking hands. most of them are fairly comfortable about being close with each other and it's not regarded as gay behaviour (unless they really are gay, or if they're joking about it)

...also, it's pretty normal for younger people to call older people (not family members) by their first names, like close family friends. I understand that this isn't acceptable in some other cultures though. For older people that I don't know as well, or in formal situations (school or work), calling them Mr. X or Ms. X is fine.

Oaspete

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Postby Oaspete » 2005-05-13, 11:41

Luís wrote:

In Portugal, guys greet guys by handshaking, guys greet girls by kissing on both cheeks (left, then right :) ) and girls greet everyone by kissing. There are some exceptions though, when I guy would be allowed to kiss another guy :-) Me, for instance, I kiss my father, my grandfather and my older brother. Handshaking would seem too distant, since they're family.

Touching is allowed and very much used Gesticulation is very important and specially amongst friends, you can touch almost everything :D Favourite areas though are shoulders, hands, arms, the back, etc


The same in Romania.Girls can hold hands(most do)in public and they are not seen as lesbians.
People dance(boys and girls).
You can be late for 15min or so.More is considerd too much(not for girls-especially if it is a date :roll: ).
A date is just a date(it does not implay anything).
You can visit people without an invitation if you are friends(if not is best to call them first).Dinking in public is acceptable(altough somtimes police officer will tell you to stop).Older people,in formal sitation are adressed with their laste name and Mr(Domnul) or Ms(Doamna/Domnisoara) and their last name

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Postby Gormur » 2005-05-18, 18:07

My family is Norwegian. I never grew up with the hugging or kissing stuff even when I was a baby. That would be uncomfortable for me now. I guess it´s just a different way. I think northern Europeans (incl Dutch) share many cultural similarities. We are more reserved sometimes because we´re shy or whatever. In Skandinavia, it goes back to the historic isolation of farmers and fishermen. I know I have times when I just want to be in solitude.

Definitely we´re not cold or unfriendly. I think we´re less formal because we don´t care what people think so much about our personality and are more easy going.

That´s my view anyway, and I´ve grown up in a Norwegian town in California from birth.

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Postby Gormur » 2005-06-14, 0:37

rattylhed wrote:
JackFrost wrote:
It is unusual for friends (boy to girl, girl to girl) to kiss each other, and boy to boy friends handshaking while under 18-21, but over 18-21, it becomes more common. Hugging between friends is more common than kissing...boys and girls often do this together.

You can see couple kissing on cheek quite often in public, it's unusual to see kissing with tongues, but it is not considered rude.


same up here in Canada... for friends (all ages), it is normal to hug each other. Older people though (good friends or family), they hug and kiss once on the cheek. Younger guys here shake hands and sort of half-hug while they are still shaking hands. most of them are fairly comfortable about being close with each other and it's not regarded as gay behaviour (unless they really are gay, or if they're joking about it)

...also, it's pretty normal for younger people to call older people (not family members) by their first names, like close family friends. I understand that this isn't acceptable in some other cultures though. For older people that I don't know as well, or in formal situations (school or work), calling them Mr. X or Ms. X is fine.


Really? :shock: Obviously every part of Canada has its differences, because it's definitely not that way in Manitoba. It's very conservative here. Many people from other provinces (particularly from Ontario) call Manitobans "cold" and "unfriendly". They don't touch. I think it's similar in the States too; just depending where you are. I've never lived on the east, but have plenty of friends from there to know it IS different from say the mid-west, west, north, etc. Prairie Canada is like prairie USA, Toronto is like NYC, Vancouver is like Seattle, etc. I've been to all of these places and see very few differences (besides the signs being posted in French and English, and the high number of East Indians and E Asians in Canada). Canada is simply more European (somehow), more British in character/or French (depending on the province), much colder, and has terrible road conditions. :P

But I love Canada. :D

P.S. - the only place I've encountered the kissing and hugging is with my Québecois friends. Upon first meeting, I was expected to kiss as well...

Cheers!

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Postby Kirk » 2005-06-16, 10:04

I think here in California at least we may have somewhat a mix of "traditional" US conceptions about what kind of physical touch is appropriate in certain situations and what isn't. I believe physical touch here is more prevalent and desirable than is typical in Northern Europe, even tho the Northern Europe heritage may be seen in our conception of the unwritten but understood "personal space bubble" especially for acquaitances or strangers.

Hugs seem to be pretty common here, no matter the sex, altho for guys to hug they tend to be closer friends, but in my experience they don't have to be super close. At least that's how it is for me--I hug a lot my male friends when I see them but otherwise a handshake will usually do for guys I don't know as well. There's also the intermediate "guy hug" which is a handshake with the right hand with the left hand reaching for the other guy's back to do a half-hug/pat on the back. For girls it's often a hug, and at least here you don't necessarily have to be as good a friend with the girl to hug them as with a guy. Of course it also depends on the person, as some people are clearly more physically affectionate than others are even in the same social setting.

People almost universally shake hands in some shape or form when meeting, no matter the situation or gender. Kissing is rare here, but I've kissed very close female friends on the cheek before. Girls also don't tend to do it very often here amongst each other, it being even rarer for guys, altho not unheard of (and of course I'm referring to non-gay guys here, I think it goes without saying gay people are much more likely to kiss the same sex :) ). Some close male friends may kiss on the cheek as kind of a playful thing or a joke (I've done that before), but it's certainly not the norm as it is in a place like Argentina.

When I lived in Argentina this past year I got really used to the practice of kissing--you kiss when you meet people and usually when you see them subsequently--no matter the sex. I thought it was a sweet gesture and was never sexual, just affectionate. It was really easy to start doing with other Argentines 'cuz I knew that's all they expected me to do, but it took a little longer for me to do it with my American friends, especially the guys. But by the end of my study-abroad program even many of the American guys, including me, would greet each other with Argentine-style kisses, as we'd gotten very comfortable with it. It was also highly encouraged by my abroad program, and they even had a practice "kissing session" at the beginning of our program where we all went around in the room practicing kissing each other Argentine-style (cheeks touching, kisses or kissing sounds in the air..the lips don't actually touch the other person's skin, you do this all once on the right cheek).

I work parttime for an English language program for foreigners in San Diego and the vast majority of them are East-Asians--from China, Korea, and Japan, and it's clear that the norms here for hugging and general physical contact are usually somewhat uncomfortable for them. In my experience it takes much less time in the development of a friendship for me to hug an American (Californian) friend, guy or girl, than to reach that same level with an East-Asian (I'm specifically not referring to Americans of Asian descent, as they tend to follow the general norms here as other American-born people do) person. A common thing they've often told me is that the first time an American hugged them or looked directly in their eye they felt pretty uncomfortable and didn't know exactly what to do, but just as I grew to love Argentine kisses some of them get used to and warm up to our hugging culture.

Of course, I should state that all this I've been talking about has largely dealt with my experience as a relatively young person (I'm 21) and as a college student--I can't necessarily speak for other subcultures here.
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Postby Ved » 2005-07-17, 7:05

Ok, here are a few major (Anglo) Canadian no-no's:

Never ask about a person's finances.

Never ask about a person's age. They need to volunteer this kind of information in a conversation.

If you have a runny nose due to a cold, never sniffle. Always blow your nose.

Never spit in front of other people. (excluding members of medical professions in their official capacity, I guess). You'd be surprised how many non-Canadians visiting Canada are unaware of this.

If your dog poos on the street, don't forget to stoop and scoop.
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Postby Kirk » 2005-07-17, 7:37

Ved wrote:Ok, here are a few major (Anglo) Canadian no-no's:

Never ask about a person's finances.

Never ask about a person's age. They need to volunteer this kind of information in a conversation.

If you have a runny nose due to a cold, never sniffle. Always blow your nose.

Never spit in front of other people. (excluding members of medical professions in their official capacity, I guess). You'd be surprised how many non-Canadians visiting Canada are unaware of this.

If your dog poos on the street, don't forget to stoop and scoop.


I would say most of those apply to general American culture as well. You don't ask about someone's finances--you can talk about business, or their job, etc., but "how much money do you make?" or "how much did your house cost?" is a big no-no. I remember our next-door neighbor, who's originally from Punjab in India, one time asking my dad how much we'd paid for our new car and it caused a short moment of awkward silence as I think my dad was somewhat taken aback by the question (he recovered and answered it but I remember thinking it seemed like a weird question to ask).

The age thing is generally true here, too. Altho I'm not personally offended if someone asks me my age (I don't care if the world knows I'm 21) and I may ask it to someone who looks around my age, it's not something I'd ask a middle-aged woman :)

In terms of sniffling, I've never noticed it being that big of a social faux-pas--in my experience it's looked upon with some amount of sympathy, as in "oh, you poor thing, you have a cold" but I would agree if done in excessive amounts and no efforts have been made to find a tissue then it could be crossing social faux-pas boundaries.

The spitting one seems like a no-brainer to me--I haven't really seen that be an issue here, but, yes, we're conditioned it's not polite to spit in public either.

The dog poo one is one followed by some people (I can see some people carrying their little shovels with them as they walk their dogs in my neighborhood, and some parks here do have "doggie-bag" stations where you pull off a bag to clean up the poop), but the degree a dog-owner is willing to go to clean it up depends on the person. Of course, in relatively low-density places (and I don't mean rural, just suburban/semi-urban areas, which is where most Americans live) it's not as much of an issue anyway. When I lived in Buenos Aires, with its towering apartment buildings where everyone seemed to have a dog, the issue of dog poop on the sidewalks was a big problem, even in the nicest neighborhoods. I hear other denser-type cities around the world have this problem, too--I read a report about a French artist who got so fed up with it in Paris that he started putting little flags on top of the little piles of dog waste he found to draw attention to the problem :)
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Exactly the same...

Postby Weldal » 2005-07-17, 21:37

Luís wrote:In Portugal, guys greet guys by handshaking, guys greet girls by kissing on both cheeks (left, then right ) and girls greet everyone by kissing. There are some exceptions though, when I guy would be allowed to kiss another guy Me, for instance, I kiss my father, my grandfather and my older brother. Handshaking would seem too distant, since they're family.

Touching is allowed and very much used Gesticulation is very important and specially amongst friends, you can touch almost everything Favourite areas though are shoulders, hands, arms, the back, etc


Exactly the same here in Brazil. I think that we have much more in common than some guys (you know them), who devaluate the cultural inheritance, can imagine... :)

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Postby Gormur » 2005-07-30, 4:17

Ved wrote:Ok, here are a few major (Anglo) Canadian no-no's:

Never ask about a person's finances.

Never ask about a person's age. They need to volunteer this kind of information in a conversation.

If you have a runny nose due to a cold, never sniffle. Always blow your nose.

Never spit in front of other people. (excluding members of medical professions in their official capacity, I guess). You'd be surprised how many non-Canadians visiting Canada are unaware of this.

If your dog poos on the street, don't forget to stoop and scoop.


Probably Western "no-no's" anyway. And not to be offensive, but a lot of culture is based on the area. E.G. - I'm in Winnipeg, which is a lot like ND or MN in terms of culture (in small ways it is uniquely Canadian), Alberta is similar to Montana, etc...sorry to generalize, but it is true. The truly unique places I can think of are Québec, Nunavut, and NFL, all of which I've been to (except Nunavut, but I've been to Churchill! :P ). My mom's employer is Newfie, and her mother sounds like she is from Ireland (very thick accent).

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Re: Exactly the same...

Postby Gormur » 2005-07-30, 4:21

Weldal wrote:
Luís wrote:In Portugal, guys greet guys by handshaking, guys greet girls by kissing on both cheeks (left, then right ) and girls greet everyone by kissing. There are some exceptions though, when I guy would be allowed to kiss another guy Me, for instance, I kiss my father, my grandfather and my older brother. Handshaking would seem too distant, since they're family.

Touching is allowed and very much used Gesticulation is very important and specially amongst friends, you can touch almost everything Favourite areas though are shoulders, hands, arms, the back, etc


Brazil is "da bomb", esp Curitiba. All of the gostazas there in the German town...I would practise my Portuguese, but most of my knowledge would likely upset or offend you guys. :wink:

Exactly the same here in Brazil. I think that we have much more in common than some guys (you know them), who devaluate the cultural inheritance, can imagine... :)

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Postby greg-fr » 2005-07-30, 16:44

Kirk wrote:I read a report about a French artist who got so fed up with it in Paris that he started putting little flags on top of the little piles of dog waste he found to draw attention to the problem.


Excellente initiative.
Many things you mentioned apply to France too.

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Postby pierrick18 » 2005-08-11, 0:03

NulNuk, your spelling is horrid! Use a spell checker, I know that if you can spell like that you can spell correctly. "Chatspeak" is very, very, very, very hard to read and you might as well just hit random keys on the keyboard because it would be easier to read. :roll:

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Postby Kirk » 2005-08-11, 0:20

pierrick18 wrote:NulNuk, your spelling is horrid! Use a spell checker, I know that if you can spell like that you can spell correctly. "Chatspeak" is very, very, very, very hard to read and you might as well just hit random keys on the keyboard because it would be easier to read. :roll:


?? I don't even see NulNuk's post on this thread. Would you care to quote it so we know what you're talking about?
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'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe.

I eat prescriptivists for breakfast.

maɪ nemz kʰɜ˞kʰ n̩ aɪ laɪk̚ fɨˈnɛ̞ɾɪ̞ks

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Postby kibo » 2005-08-11, 0:27

pierrick18 wrote:NulNuk, your spelling is horrid! Use a spell checker, I know that if you can spell like that you can spell correctly. "Chatspeak" is very, very, very, very hard to read and you might as well just hit random keys on the keyboard because it would be easier to read. :roll:


NulNuk is dyslexic, he doesn't do that on purpose, and I don't think a spell-checker would be of any use.

svenska84 wrote:?? I don't even see NulNuk's post on this thread. Would you care to quote it so we know what you're talking about?


There is one on the first page of this thread.
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Postby Luís » 2005-08-11, 10:14

I dunno about the others, but even if NulNuk's spelling might be "horrid", it's still almost 100% intelligible, at least to me...
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Postby Javier » 2005-08-11, 14:08

I even like a lot to read them (the posts), not because on how it looks, but because of the content, is interesting.
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