As I think you guys are likely to be unfamiliar with them both, I've copy-pasted the two of them. My question is at the bottom.
The original version:
- A liberal muslim homosexual ACLU lawyer professor and abortion doctor was teaching a class on Karl Marx, known atheist.
“Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Marx and accept that he was the most highly-evolved being the world has ever known, even greater than Jesus Christ!”
At this moment, a brave, patriotic, pro-life Navy SEAL champion who had served 1500 tours of duty and understood the necessity of war and fully supported all military decision made by the United States stood up and held up a rock.
“How old is this rock, pinhead?”
The arrogant professor smirked quite Jewishly and smugly replied “4.6 billion years, you stupid Christian.”
“Wrong. It’s been 5,000 years since God created it. If it was 4.6 billion years old and evolution, as you say, is real... then it should be an animal now.”
The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of Origin of the Species. He stormed out of the room crying those liberal crocodile tears. He wished so much that he had a gun to shoot himself from embarrassment, but he himself had petitioned against them!
The students applauded and all registered Republican that day and accepted Jesus as their lord and savior. An eagle named “Small Government” flew into the room and perched atop the American Flag and shed a tear on the chalk. The pledge of allegiance was read several times, and God himself showed up and enacted a flat tax rate across the country.
The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of the gay plague AIDS and was tossed into the lake of fire for all eternity.
p.s. close the borders
The version adapted to Japan/China:
- A kimono-wearing otaku social studies professor and hikikomori was teaching a class on Asian History.
"Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Emperor Akihito and accept that that the Japanese are the most highly-evolved human beings that the world has ever known."
At this moment, a sagacious, filial, scholar-gentleman who had scored ahead of 150,000 students in the Civil Service Exams and understood the full extent of the barbarity of those living outside the Middle Kingdom held up a copy of the Nihon Shoki.
"What are the characters written upon the pages of the Nihon Shoki?"
The arrogant professor smirked, tightened his hachimaki, and smugly replied, "Kanji, you baka."
"True, Kanji, which loosely translates into "Han characters." To be precise the Nihon Shoki is written in Guwen, which is the Classical Chinese script. If the Japanese are indeed perfect human beings then they would have come up with their own culture & civilization as opposed to just borrowing from the Chinese or from anyone else."
The Professor was visibly shaken and dropped his calligraphy brush and copy of CLAMP's Cardcaptor Sakura. He stormed out of the room and tried to commit seppuku like in his animes.
The students applauded with a big "wansui!" and all signed up with a peasant rebellion that day and declared that the scholar-gentleman had the Mandate of Heaven. A dragon named "All Under Heaven" flew into the room, coiled around the Chinese flag and magically turned it yellow. The Analects was read several times, and the Jade Emperor himself showed up and enacted territorial seizures of disputed territories around the country.
The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of complications caused by an erroneous performance of the seppuku ritual and went to Diyu, where he was tried, found guilty, and punished by the Ten Yama Kings of Diyu.
My question is of course about the "[a] dragon ... coiled around the Chinese flag and magically turned it yellow" part. What is this supposed to add to the joke? What is it a reference to? Is it perhaps a reference to the yellowness of the Qing Dynasty standard, and so serves to recall the days of imperial China?